When you were a teenager, and asked your parents for Twenty Dollars, a new shirt or a new pair of jeans, the most likely response is a resounding “NO”. You became angry with your parents; your parents did not understand your needs and the problems you have to contend with. In your mind, the request was totally justified, everyone was buying a new more fashionable pair of jeans, and it has been more than six months since you purchased the last one, and it’s almost falling apart from daily wear. And so it goes with each request, the Twenty dollars, you needed to go with your friends to the movies, sure the movie was only ten dollars, but there is the hamburger and the pop corn and the soda. You asked yourself then, why don’t my parents understand me? Why do they give me such a hard time? Sometimes an argument resulted, branching into different claims and counter claims; poverty, bills to pay, and mortgage payments argued your parents, while frustration, rejection and alienation was your fate. It turns out that what happened to you is totally expected and is only obeying Newton’s First Law also called the Law of Inertia.

Take another example; George not a bad looking college student is all dressed up for an evening with his friends at a dance club. George sees this beautiful woman (Kate) having a drink with a group of her friends at the opposite end of the bar. George and friends comment about how beautiful the woman is. George summons all of his courage, walks up to the woman and asks her to dance. The woman says “NO”. George is devastated, he has been rejected, he returns back dejected and feeling miserable. His friends make sarcastic remarks, making him feel even worse. His evening ruined, he decides to go to another club or worse go home. What happened to George is totally expected according to Newton’s first law.

Newton’s First Law says that an object which is stationary or moving at a constant speed will continue indefinitely unless acted upon by an external force. Another way to view the First Law is; that an object or an entity will continue to do whatever it is doing unless there is a reason and a drive to change. So an object that is stationary like a chair is going to stay that way unless you apply a force to it, that is if you pull it, it will move towards you and if you push it will move away from you. Consider a tennis ball traveling to the opposite court, when it meets the racket of the opponent, a force changes the balls motion as it returns it to the other side. If there was no racket in its path, the ball should continue to move in its original direction.
This tendency of objects in nature to want to remain in the same state and to resist any changes unless the object is forced to do so is called the inertial property. The inertial property then is the resistance to change; the object will not change unless it is forced to or somehow motivated by an attractive or repulsive effects to change. Another example of this tendency to resist change is best illustrated with this scenario: you are driving with your books, a brief case, or a package is on the passenger seat next to you. Suddenly some one driving the car in front of you slams on the brakes and so do you, bringing your car to a sudden stop. The books or package on the passenger side goes flying to the floor. The books were in motion and they continued in motion even when the car stopped, the books maintained their inertial property, the tendency to move forward. Another example of this tendency to remain is seen when a performer pulls the table cloth from under a set of dinner ware on a set table. The heavier dishes with lots of inertia want to remain atop the table where they sat and that is where they remain after the tablecloth is pulled. This trick could not be done with lighter paper plates, since these lighter plates have less inertia and are less likely to remain in place at the table.

The more mass or weight the object has the more of this resistive inertia it has, and therefore the harder it is to move or cause any change in its motion. A football player is a good example to illustrate this point; large heavy players are harder to move in a line tackle and also hard to stop when carrying the ball and moving for a touchdown,

So when you asked your parents for the new pair of jeans, you have been thinking about the need, the condition of the jeans you are wearing, the friends that have the new jeans, and your need to fit in. Your parents on the other hand are totally unaware of all your thoughts. The sudden expense of a new pair of jeans, unjustified in their mind is a totally a new idea that changes the state of balance they have established, hence the immediate rejection. You were changing the situation, and they resisted the change.
What should you have done? You need to provide the same motivation for your parents First you might approach your parents with the idea that your jeans are wearing thin, that holes are coming through, but don’t ask for new jeans. Later on in the day, you might mention that your friend Sally bought these really great jeans and they are on SALE at the mall (parents love to hear the word sale). You get the picture, this way your thoughts are transmitted and so is the justification to your parents, and the idea is no longer a big change that they will resist. I am willing to bet that your parent’s inertial resistance will be reduced and that you will get the new jeans.

In George’s case he is totally unknown to Kate. Kate is in a somewhat stable situation with her girlfriends having a drink, she is comfortable and at ease in that state with a large amount of inertial resistance. There is inertia here to remain in that state otherwise Kate would be in a different group and a different setting. In asking her to dance, George wants to change this stable situation, and the tendency to resist change on the part of Kate unconsciously comes out as a NO. If George knew about Newton’s First law, he would know that even if Kate was approached by Brad Pitt or Tom Cruse without the fame, the answer would be the same NO. To secure a dance partner George might consider asking 10 girls on the chance that 9 will say NO and one will say YES only because her situation is not all that stable, and he might have enough force of gravitation to pull it off. To improve the chances of success, George might consider a woman alone with no apparent attachments weighing her down, or a woman with one companion only, since this would reduce the stability of her situation and tends to reduce the resistance to change. Other factors that reduce this resistance include how many drinks she had, if she broke up or does not have a boyfriend or other permanent attachments.

George might consider an alternative strategy if Kate is his only choice. He might approach Kate, and introduce himself and walk away, like “Hi I couldn’t help noticing you, my name is George”. The next time he approaches, or has a planned accidental bump into Kate, he is still unknown, however he is not a total stranger, George might comment on the music, the atmosphere, her dress…etc and still walks away. You can see that the more times there are an interaction between the two without trying to remove Kate from her situation, the more familiar and comfortable she gets. George has to be spontaneous and the encounters seem accidental. When George finally asks her to dance the same night or even a different night, she does not feel a change and unconsciously says YES. It would be helpful, if George has a confident voice, self-assured and has some attractive qualities and not a total dork.


Countless arguments take place everyday between a variety of people in a various relationships and settings; between husbands and wives, sisters and brothers, parents and offspring, you name it, much of it has to do with Newton’s First Law.
The wife says, “honey, I need a new dryer”, or “I need a vacation without the children”, while the husband is thinking “the latest titanium driver would do wonders to my golf game” or “that new fishing pole is guaranteed to catch lots of fish”. When each consults the other about their needs and wants, the immediate answer is NO. The most successful at getting what they want are spouses that approach the subject well prepared with the appropriate steps.
The major rule here is to never, never, never (did I say it enough times) spring a surprise. Always lay the ground work, plan your attack and gradually introduce your subject of discussion, and above all be patient. Most of us want immediate response to our needs; you can save yourself a lot of headaches and get the desired response if you remember that a NO is only natural.
There are some people like a mother in law I know, who commence her response in a conversation by a “NO” even when she is in complete agreement with the point being made. The idea of NO as a human response may be built into the subconscious mind. It may be that we are conditioned internally to think that, if someone else wants something from us, that it is probably good for them and therefore must not be so good for us. The tendency to preserve our survival may be inherent in the refusal of other people’s demands, and even their ideas. If it is good for them, it is likely bad for us goes the selfish logic.
I always have the same advice when I encounter a couple about to get married; they are usually floating on cloud nine without concern for the coming encounters. No one ever taught us a course in high school or college about marriage. We learn about geography and history, but not about the most important relationship in life. We dive right in unknowing the intricacies and the delicacy of dealing with another person of the opposite sex, with a different set of memories, experiences, genetic structure and inherited characteristics for the rest of our lives. Many ends in divorce, resentment, disappointments and isolation characterize much of the rest of those relationships. My advice to each couple getting married is to add to the vows they are making a vow to “never say NO “no matter how outlandish or insane the proposal is or idea may appear at first, and it will. Just say “I will think about it”. This is not going to be easy; you know you just want to scream how stupid and ridiculous the proposal is. No matter how unreasonable the proposal may sound, hold your tongue, this is your loving friend or spouse. When you look back after some give and take and mutual explanations of the limitations and constraints financial and otherwise, the idea may not be so outlandish and it may turn out that is something you may have wanted all along. Refraining from saying NO, not only will you be improving your relationship, but also you will reduce physical and mental stress, which is good for your health. It has been shown that stress diminishes the ability of the brain to function well especially in women.

Do you ever listen to yourself arguing with your spouse, children, relatives or friends? Most people are so convinced of the validity of the positions they take, they are incapable of reexamining their own logic It seems to me most arguments do not follow the rules of logic. The response is immediate and a NO, a rejection of the point being made by the adversary in the argument. Most of the time those arguing are not listening to each other, they hear but they do not evaluate and process the information conveyed by the other person. Each is only interested in rebutting the argument by whatever means they have regardless of it’s relevance to the subject of the argument. They often raise sensitive points with references to relatives, past events, and errors made by the adversary even though they have nothing to do with the present argument. The inability to present a logical rebuttal frustrates the respondent that they lose control of the situation and the argument degenerates into name calling. Individuals who are self-centered seem more likely to invoke all kinds of perceived infractions to enforce their position.
The same argument often repeats over and over again without resolution. Each party continues to reject the counter presentation without much consideration of the counter argument. In these circumstances, I am often reminded of the wisdom of the saying; “your friends need no explanation and your enemies will never understand”. When the futility of continuing the argument becomes evident, you should stop the argument at least on your side. You may consider leaving the room, or ask for a halt to reconsider both positions. You may even consider a drastic measure like agreeing with the other party. Perhaps saying, “YES” will result in a more amicable resolution of the argument perhaps even to your own?
Couples should set the ground rules for arguing as soon as possible, preferably in the early period of courtship, when they are more liable to agree. First each must wait for a period of no less than 10 seconds before responding to a statement made by the other, during that time the individual must promise to rethink seriously with an open mind what has just been said, hopefully this will reduce the NO response. Second each must avoid the initial rejection and make a strong effort to listen fully to the other person, comprehend the condition and the circumstances involved as they relate to the situation at hand. Third, the response must be made to the statement being made without deviation or the invocation of other unrelated topics and individuals.
Do not bring out a host of past resentments and disappointments bottled up over many years. This will only further confuse the situation and make it even more difficult to resolve the argument. Rather than generate new arguments that become confused and harder to resolve, creating an irresolvable chaotic situation, focus on the topic under discussion. You are most likely to succeed in resolving these issues if you deal with them one at a time including these resentments bottled up over the years. Remember, the smaller the job, the easier it is to do. Check my chapter on Energy for more detail.


The circulation department of your local newspaper calls you up to ask if you would like to subscribe for home delivery of the paper. Your immediate answer is NO. So the circulation department calls up and offers you free home delivery for eight weeks. What do you say then? Most likely you will say YES; after all you are getting something for nothing. Obviously, the newspaper is not in business of giving it away. Their hope is that once they overcome your initial NO, you will get used to the flow of the paper and you will continue to subscribe for years to come. The arrival of the paper becomes part of your daily routine. Your family gets used to reading their favorite section; moms favorite, the movie section for the teenager, the sport section for the athlete in the family. Members of the family will resist stopping delivery. Stopping something in motion requires an opposing force, like stopping a car requires that you step on the brakes forcing the wheels to stop turning generating a great deal of heat energy. Unsubscribing would require additional force on your part, you have to find the subscription number usually buried somewhere in the paper, find the time to call and request that the paper be stopped and hope that happens.

So overcoming that initial NO is the key. Stores offer sales, coupons, promotions of all kinds to overcome your initial No and bring you into the store. Their hope again is that you will continue. As we stated Newton’s first law, indicates that once you get an object moving, it will continue to move on its own inertia. Even when resisting friction forces are present, it is easier to keep something moving than start it moving from rest.
A salesman for a company, who wants to secure an account with a prospective customer should find out as much as possible about this customer. The salesman may entertain the customer, invite to lunch or dinner to overcome the initial high resistance to purchase products from a new company. A smart salesman would not go for the big purchase immediately because it will be highly resisted. He knows he will be far more successful if he starts his new customer with a small order. Once the customer is in the system, receives the order catalogue he will order more and more products.

If you are a salesman for a company, you know how important that first order is no matter how small and regardless of any profit you might make or even at a loss. Once the client has an account with your company, more orders are likely to flow and the inertia will be hard to stop.
Science of Human Behavior

In the realm of the universe, man constitutes an integral part of nature, not a critical or even an important part. The individual human being represents a very complex composition of atoms and molecules, constituting multiple cell structures and organs communicating together and functioning as a whole. Utilizing the senses, signals are sent to the brain triggering responses through the central nervous system; the highly sophisticated network of ten billion neurons, each connected to the others through a thousand synapses. These signals stimulate the production of various neurotransmitters and proteins at the synapse, generating various feelings, including: joy, anger or surprise. The brain evaluates their input signals using memory of past events and the individual’s unique genetic and environmental blueprint triggering a particular action.
The process, by which man responds to a signal, is not random, but rather controlled by a set of natural laws of quantum mechanics and electrodynamics. The resulting behavior is similar to the behavior of a ball moving according to Newton’s law of gravity or light beams forming an image in accordance with laws of reflection and refraction that govern the behavior of light. When a ball drops from your hand, it first descends slowly and speeds up as it falls to the ground. The force of gravity accelerates the ball down. Knowing that the acceleration is a constant, we can accurately predict that a ball dropped from a window 16 feet high takes 1 second to hit the ground. According to the laws of optics, we can also predict that if you stand 3 feet in front of a plain mirror, you will see your image 3 feet behind the mirror. The physical laws are consistent and predict accurately what happens at a later time.
Macroscopic versus the Microscopic
The Big versus the Small
When Galileo studied the motion of a metal ball falling, or Newton investigated the fall of apples, they had no idea that these were composed of subatomic components of electrons, protons, neutrons and many others. Their laws did not cover the behavior of these subatomic particles or even larger molecules. Even though they did not know what is going on within the microscopic domain, they were able to discover the laws of nature that predicts the fall of a ball to the ground and the path of a planet around the sun. Newton's laws predict the macroscopic behavior of planets, baseballs flying to a home run, and cars speeding around a racetrack. We don’t need to know what the electrons, atoms and molecules in these objects are doing. Another example is the Temperature of the room, it measures the overall Macroscopic behavior of all the air molecules in the room. We can measure the Temperature without knowing the Microscopic properties of each individual air molecule in the room.
Man like a ball or a car is made of a very complex composition of Microscopic atoms and molecules, constituting multiple cell structures and organs communicating together and functioning as a whole unit in a Macroscopic world. The same physical laws that apply to the function of atoms and molecules in a living cell on a microscopic scale, also apply to a human as a whole, resulting in his behavior on a Macroscopic level. Like Newton, Faraday and Ohm we do not know the Microscopic behavior within the neurons in the brain, but we know that there is a correspondence with the resulting Macroscopic human behavior in accordance with the laws of Physics.

Illustration 1: Microscopic world of an atom, complex atom, molecules.
Common to illustration 2 and 3 below

Illustration 2: Macroscopic world Baseball, ball falling, and car

Illustration 3: Microscopic world of Neuron, Macroscopic world of brain, man and behavior

Do You Have a Choice?

Events in the behavior of an individual, whether child or adult, is governed by laws that, when applied uniformly, would produce the same behavioral outcome, as the falling ball. When a person moves a hand to scratch his forehead, an action taken because he senses an itch, cause and effect is demonstrated. The mechanism in the body that generates that action in response to the itch is the same, regardless of the individual. So when children scratch a mosquito bite, it is not instinct but rather the result of processes controlled by some, so far unknown, complex set of laws.
The only difference between the action of a falling ball and human action is the complexity of the system to which the laws of nature apply. The ball has no internal mechanism to change the outcome and falls the same way every time. In the case of human behavior, these laws are further complicated by the addition of stored memory of past events and experiences that modify the reaction in various ways depending on the uniqueness of the individual (in terms of genetic and environmental differences). So what appears as a random event, is not random at all, but perfectly executed and obeys a set of natural laws too complex for us to comprehend. Researchers in psychology and human behavior may try to draw some correlation of the probability of reactions in response to some action or an event. These experiments were limited due to the inability of researchers to hold constant many variables in order to draw concrete relationships between specific actions and reactions. The application of the scientific method has been limited by the inability of psychological experimenters to isolate and to fix the important physical factors. Identifying and isolating the many factors involved has to this day been an obstacle to the study of behavior. Even if the same set of electrical, and chemical signals going through two separate individuals are identically processed by their complex brains, there is no guarantee that the same behavioral outcome will result because they have varying memories, and other unique traits that will cause them to react differently. Accordingly, an individual may feel the sensation of the need to scratch an itch, but because the individual’s skin blisters when scratched and decides not to scratch. It is said “that young children will scratch a mosquito bite instinctively". It is not instinct, but rather the result of processes controlled by some, so far somewhat unknown, complex set of laws.
It may seem from this that as a consequence we might hold the individual blameless for any action that they take, whether good or bad, as judged by current cultural standards. This is not to argue that the individual is held harmless and is not responsible for the actions that they take. Behavior is a self-correcting and adaptable process; feedback is always received by the senses and processed by the brain and the entire system. This feedback then is evaluated, a judgment is made and the choice of behavior is selected and executed. Accordingly, even though our actions are expected to some extent, we always have a hand in making or changing what the response is going to be.
This does not invalidate the original thesis that human behavior is governed by a set of complex laws that are constant. What changes are not the inputs, but the uniqueness of the individual processing the resulting behavior. Research in animal behavior shows that in general, animals have no apparent uniqueness and act instinctively, meaning in predictable ways without the burden of conscience and guilt associated with human thought as defined by religious or cultural standards.
An example of this uniform behavior can been seen in the rejection of new ideas, trends or fashion. Galileo was brought before the inquisition for suggesting a new idea; that the earth revolves around the sun when everyone at the time thought that the earth was the stationary center of the universe. New fashions are generally rejected initially before they catch on. Mass reaction to verbal or written input is another example of the uniform application of the physical laws to human behavior. Speakers, appealing to nationalistic or religious passions, can inflame mobs and move crowds to carry out actions at will. Hitler, appealing to nationalistic slogans, was able to move ordinary Germans to believe they were the superior race and that the holocaust was an acceptable solution to the Jewish presence in Europe. If these factors are understood may be we can avoid catastrophes like Hitler’s Nazi Germany and prevent another holocaust from happening to the Jewish or any other people.

Science and Psychology

More than sixty years ago, B. F. Skinner wrote, “Science is more than the mere description of events as they occur. It is an attempt to discover order, to show that different events stand in lawful relation to other events.” Skinner wrote that this order is an assumption on the part of human behavior. If human behavior turns out to be random, then science cannot be applied. Further, that science should be able to describe and predict future behavior. To use science we must assume that all behavior obeys natural laws. Thus, proposing that man is a free agent suggests that free will interfere with the lawful scientific process and produces unpredictable and uncontrolled behavior.
Skinner’s interpretation that free will interferes with the scientific process disregards the fact that free will becomes a part of the scientific process introducing additional components that are integrated into the formulation that leads to the behavioral outcomes. This of course makes specific behavior much harder to predict.
In the last hundred years we have seen enormous advancements in technology, medicine, engineering, space science, and genetics and yet man has changed very little. The inputs that generate feelings of love, security, aggression, greed, and hate are still the same. The laws of nature have not changed. It should not surprise us that, to a large extent, the exposure to the additional advancements in science has not positively impacted the individual man or groups in a way consistent with the improvements and new awareness brought on by science. The hard wiring of the brain and the basic laws it functions under have not evolved much and remain unchanged. It takes millions of years of evolution for our brains to evolve to be more compassionate and ethical. Survival remains the basic drive behind most behavior, it is unfortunate that in order to survive, lying and cheating are traits that facilitate this survival, they were and they continue to be part of the equation.

Current Research in Human Behavior
The human system is a complex non -linear system with many different interacting components. In science when dealing with a multi-molecular complex structure, such as air molecules in a room, it is extremely difficult, if not impossible, to deal with properties of individual molecules and even if you could, what would it mean? Physicists have developed overall properties of the collection of molecules in the room. Properties, such as temperature of the room, give us the measure of the average intensity of the molecular energy in the room. Temperature measures the overall behavior of the molecules in the room, without knowing the properties of the individual molecules.
The human open-system is even more complex because of the continuous interaction with other humans through language spoken and written, visual, and psychological, in addition to the effects of environmental factors, such as foods, drugs, air, plants, and water,.
In the past psychological research, has been primarily linear, and has been of limited value when applied to a non-linear more complex open system, like human behavior. Nowadays there is a tremendous amount of important research going on in the various fields of behavioral science branches of neuroscience, neurobiology, neurogenetics and psychology
New technologies in mapping brain functions use the latest techniques, such as dynamic imaging. One technique utilizes magnetic resonance imaging (MRI); another is the positron emission tomography (PET). Scientists are able, in a non-invasive way, to obtain images of blood flow in the brain and to locate specific regions stimulated by various inputs. Neuroscientists and neurobiologists employ other non-invasive brain tools, such as electroencephalogram (EEG), Single Photon Emission Computed Tomography (SPECT). These techniques have been instrumental in mapping the various regions of the brain and the functions associated with these regions such as the visual cortex, the language, and hearing and emotional centers. Neurobiologist studying the simplest brains of worms to discover pathways through neurocircuits that determines behavior.
Significant research, at MIT and other institutions, in multiple behavior models, using sophisticated mathematics equations, break down the complex behavior into many different alternative models. An assessment can be made of the model representing a particular state the person is exhibiting and then predict the general likelihood of certain outcome behavior. This approach is called “multiple model” or “generalized likelihood”.
On another front, behavior geneticists are conducting important research in which they relate specific genes to a particular type of behavior. An example is the research into the effects of early childhood trauma on depression and the ability to handle stress at a later stage in life. A gene labeled 5-HTT appears in short and long form. Subjects with the long version of this gene appear to be able to deal with adverse situations. Those with the short version of 5-HTT are prone to depression in the face of adversity or trauma. It seems that the vulnerability to depression at a later stage in life arises from both disturbing events experienced at an early stage in life and an inherited short 5-HTT gene.
As important as these research findings, and the light they shed on the functions and operations of the brain, it will be a long time, if ever, before any clear and scientific understanding of human behavior is achieved. The challenge will be how we can integrate the resulting information from this research into a behavioral model.
This book is not based on empirical research in neuroscience, but rather on anecdotal evidence learned from teaching Physics laws over many years and observing the similarity of human behavior and the predictable behavior of nature in accordance with these laws. To establish the validity of these correlations, research was conducted on the effects of various elements of relationships and their impact on the behavior of the individuals involved. A quantification of Relational Entropy, Elastic Constant, Resistance and Uncertainty in relationships, and their effect on behavior were studied with up to 500 individuals participating over a period of 4 years.

It is intended to explain to the reader the reasons we behave the way we do, and how to use this information to achieve your goals for a happier and more conflict free relationships.
In chapter one we intend to explore Newton’s laws of dynamics, those of equilibrium and action reaction to show you how you can get what you desire from others and how to avoid conflict.
In chapter two you will explore Elastic behavior and Hook’s law, this will help you realize how to control your life and advise your children to set the proper limitations in conduct and relationships, and to assess the likelihood of success in your present relationship.
In chapter three you will explore the laws of Thermodynamics and Entropy to learn how you can keep your relationship healthy and how you can assess the suitability of an intended mate.
In chapter four from the dynamics of Newton’s second law you will learn how to persuade people and win arguments.
In chapter five you will explore the laws of uncertainty, and how you can use it for a happier and better life.
In chapter six you will explore the laws of conservation and energy to help you balance and control your life. You will learn the laws of economics in accordance with the laws of physics and how to become rich in the process.
In addendum I, you will find a questionnaires that will assess the predictability of success in your relationship.
In addendum II, you will find a questionnaire that evaluates the elastic constant in your relationship and the happiness level it will produce for you.